Scarlett Letters

Last night, Billy Joel played the first of two concerts that will constitute the last such at Shea Stadium before the venue's destruction. jon_chance posted about attending the show over in her LJ (for which I am truly grateful; I am envious of her getting to attend but delighted for her that she did). Both Newsday and The New York Times have posted poetic, nostalgic reviews of the show. All this discussion has made me a little homesick this morning.

At the end of every contract, at the end of every job, someone in my Northwest posse inevitably asks me if I'm moving back to New York now. With the end of this contract looming, I've already had two people ask this very question. It's become sort of a ritual, the nearly-annual reconsideration of my residence in Seattle. I won't lie and say that moving back hasn't occurred to me because it does, and often. You can take the girl out of New York but you can't take the New York out of the girl, even if she has gone a little native. (There are only two business suits in my closet: one that's never been worn, and one that was last worn more than a year ago -- for a funeral.)

The point is...the prospect is always there in the back of my mind. It never goes away. The arguments for a return are many and compelling: living closer to my brother; living closer to the friends who have been with me longer than anyone here in the Northwest ever will be -- simply due to math if nothing else; theater and museums unparalleled by anything in Seattle; a whole different job market; a whole different life. It would be another new beginning. Such things are difficult to navigate but rarely, in my experience, bad.

Seattle has its own compelling reasons for staying: a circle of friends who have become a second family, a quality of life that is hard to argue with, a condo that I really do like, a less stressful ambiance over all and, my God, it's beautiful here. There's a lot to be said for seeing a volcano and a lake during your commute rather than the inside of a subway tunnel. I used to say that one of the reasons I'm still in Seattle is that I haven't done everything here that I was meant to do yet; now, I'm not so sure about that. And the job market here hasn't been kind or easy on me; that's for sure.

But this discussion always ends up pretty much even. Every argument for a decision one way or another has an equally compelling counterbalance. The best explanation I ever wrote for my being torn was a poem called "Bicoastal," which I'll include beneath a cut. (I wrote it during a brief flirtation with the idea of getting into the slam scene, so it's probably better spoken than read but there it is.)

This morning, I'm in a New York State of Mind. Tonight, I'll drive home across Lake Washington with Mount Rainier reigning over the landscape and wonder how I could ever consider forsaking the mountains for Manhattan.

( This seesaw tug of two lovers is too great to bear )

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My first guitar was named Daniel. My current guitar is named Jonathan, for someone I knew during my Rocky Horror Picture Show days. Named it when I was 17 years old. (Yes, wanton_heat_jet, really.)

My beloved Saturn coupe was called Fezzig, mainly because the license plate letters were FZG. No one ever knew but me and the care.

I had a stuffed cat named Jim.

You?

Since these two questions are so closely related for me, I'm answering them in the same post.

barefoot_grrl asks:
Do you ever wish you'd never heard of/gotten into the book publishing thing?

No cut necessary: Yes. Absolutely. And then I stop and think about all that I'd be giving up if I asked for a do-over and get over the whole notion.

kistha asks a corollary:
Is there an alternate "life path" that you didn't take that you wonder about? If not, what other kinds of life would you liked to have had?

( Answer beneath the cut )

spazzychic asks:

You always have had like, 10 levels of super-successful powerful woman with berets of steel in my mind. So my question, and please ignore the connotations that I can't help but have but really don't intend you to kill me with your brain by it but...

What was it like when you were 25?

( Answer beneath the cut )

Here it is, my annual round-up meme. These questions always make me think a little bit. I don't always answer the questions very deeply, but I certainly think deeply about them. Tonight I look back. Tomorrow, I'll look forward. Here we go (friends encouraged to click beneath the cut):

1. What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?
1) Went to Kenya.
2) Sold a story to Orson Scott Card's Intergalactic Medicine Show.
3) Took five days away from home to write. Just write.
4) Painted my home and rearranged the rooms (with lots of help).
5) Took time off from working full time without registering for Unemployment. It was the least stressful time I've ever had. Wonderful.
6) Signed up for eHarmony.com.

( More questions and answers... )

36. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007.
Give yourself what you want when you can. You only go 'round once, and what's the point of waiting? And if you can share that thing, do. Also? Tell the people you love that you love them. Tell them often. More important: show them.

I love all youse guys. Really. I do.

Here's hoping for a happy, healthy, peaceful new year. Stay in one piece, everyone, and let's all meet here again next year. All of us.

I asked the bhagwan to ping me on this meme and he complied, so now I must as well. Herewith I present a meme new to me but not, apparently, to anyone else:

Request feedback as a comment, and I will pick seven of your “stated interests”. You then explain your choice of them in your journal and iterate the meme.

Here are the interests bhagwanx asked me about:

( Baaaaah. I am a meme sheep.... )

Anyone? Anyone? Beuller?

Is it crass to say, "My birthday's in 9 days. If you'd like to know, click here for my wishlist"?

Okay, so I guess I'm being crass. See my icon.

In the meanwhile, despite a marked lack of sleep, I'm fairly chipper, mildly congested, and vaguely ambitious. Let's see what happens.

ironymaiden asks:

( 1. what's your favorite (as a reader, not as a work accomplishment) of the books you edited? )

( 2. what's your favorite place to go out to eat in Seattle? )

( 3. tell me about your first con. was it business or pleasure? )

( 4. do you want a godless dollar? do you have any interest in coins that are mistakes? )

( 5. you have friends all over. is there a friend-containing location you have low or no desire to visit, even though you would be happy to see the person? )

ETA: bhagwanx points out that I forgot to post the rules:

Meme rules for those who have managed to miss them somehow:
1. Leave me a comment saying, "interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you five questions.
3. You will update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.

As some of you may know, I go through periods of genealogy-mania. As a result, I've become something of a family archivist, especially for my father's family. I try to keep all the material in one place, but every now and then I find items that have strayed from my completely unscientific storage and filing system (which must be improved, really). Among the things I have found is ( the elaborate, engraved certificate that certifies my grandfather as a Shriner )

I've also found a 1927 letter from Eddie Cantor to my grandfather, confirming family stories that they were friends. The letter is a note declining a dinner invitation because he must attend to rehearsals for a play called "Kid Boots" which, according to IMDB, was later filmed and in which he starred.

There's a whole stack of my grandmother's drawings; she was a very good portraitist.

And then there's my grandmother's report card or, as it says here, "Estimate of Graduating Pupil's Attainments" from 1911. She was a solid B+ student. ( Here are some (in fact, less than half) of thing things upon which she was graded, word for word )

See what happens when you clean house? :-)

Here it is: 2006 in review. Took me several days and quite a bit of thinking to fill it out this year. My conclusion is that I'm ready to start a new year without too much looking backward. I should also note for the record that Rob Brezny's predictions for my 2006 panned out neither literally nor metaphorically. Ahead to 2007. Here we go....

1. What did you do in 2006 that you'd never done before?
1) Quit a job without having another job to replace it.
2) Gave a presentation at the Pacific Northwest Numismatic Association Coin Show.
3) Submitted a story to the Writers of the Future competition.

( See the rest here. Friends are encouraged to look. I say nice things. )

36. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2006.
Don't make an important life choice because you feel cornered. Make an important life choice that will make you feel free.

Happy new year, everyone. Stay safe tonight. I'll see you in 2007—may it be a happier, healthier, and more peaceful year than 2006.