Reporting in from Portland

[scarlettina]

I have a number of things I want to write about today.

* Doctor Who: The End of Time Part II
* Demons, a new supernatural series on BBCA
* My Portland visit so far See below.
* More thoughts on the job search
* Book review/report on Ken Scholes' novel Lamentation

I don't know when or if I'll get to all of these things, but those are my LJ goals. I have other goals for today, too.

* Get through a phone interview this afternoon.
* Start writing that story I'm supposed to have mostly finished by now.
* Take care of some stuff around the house here.
* Take a walk.
* Work out plans for this weekend.
* Work out some plans for my friend MW's visit this coming week.
* Finalize the menu for dinner tonight and go shopping.

I'm ambitious. What can I say? How about I write about the visit first, since that's what the subject line says?

Portland visit so far
Arrived Wednesday afternoon at jaylake's place a little later than I wanted to. The rain was monstrous bad all the way south, with visibility maybe 15-20 feet before everything dissolved into a silvery gray, waving curtain of rain. The semis all over the road made things harder, throwing water off themselves furiously. I made good time, took rest breaks as I needed to, but it was a nasty drive.

Shortly after I got here, my host and I took off for a pizza-and-salad dinner at DeNicola's. He said this was the fullest meal he'd had since before chemo. It meant we came home with leftovers, which provided snacks and meals the next day. Good food and good catch up.

Thursday, while Jay was working, I took off and spent some time with kateyule. We went to lunch at this terrific natural food place (the name of which escapes me) that served organic meals in a sort of Mexican burrito/wrap style. We split one of their large chicken-and-cheese burritos as well as a piece of delicious berry pie, and I had a glass of fresh squeezed apple juice. Afterwards, we went back to Kate's and did a little baking--or at least, baking prep. Sadly, I couldn't stay long enough to complete the process and enjoy the fruits of our labor. Anyway, while the dough chilled in the fridge, we walked the neighborhood, passing Linus Pauling's childhood house (with the great big red helix sculpture in front of it) and visiting a quirky antiques shop just around the corner from Kate's place.

I spent the balance of the day reading and dipping my toe into possible sources for the story that's not started yet. Jay and I grabbed dinner last night at Chevy's, a Mexican food place I was unfamiliar with but is apparently part of a national chain. We spent the evening--a short one since his energy is limited--just chilling a bit. He's had stuff to deal with this week--work stuff, day-to-day-couldn't-see-it-coming stuff, and life stuff that's just been wearing him out. I gave him a spoon.

Today's been quiet. I've spent the morning alternately online, cleaning house here and there as needed, and compiling a mental list of ways to help Jay keep track of things like when the fridge needs to be cleaned out, how to ensure he eats regularly, and so on. We'll be putting together a list of emergency phone numbers to put on the fridge, along with other helps and reminders. I'm concerned about how some things will be taken care of when he's by himself--not just stuff that can be handled with posted reminders, but regular stuff that requires more energy than he may have during any given day or week. I need to think about how some of that can be addressed. Mostly, he and I have talked about putting processes in place which, once they get rolling, can be maintained by himself or anyone near and dear to him who is present and willing to help out.

And now, I must go work on interview prep.

Comments

[mevennen.livejournal.com]

This is the trouble with cancer (OK, apart from the obvious) - it's so fucking time consuming. What you are doing is amazing, and purely from the perspective of someone who has been through it even though I am on the other side of the world in this instance - thank you for doing this for our friend.

[scarlettina.livejournal.com]

First, you're welcome, though I don't really think thanks are necessary (or wanted, honestly).

Here's the thing: I don't think I'm doing anything, anymore than calendula_witch or shellyrae did last week, or than others will do next week and so on. I'm helping out a friend and trying to make sure he can move forward as independently as he can for as long as he can. And the truth is this is my opportunity to make that difference because I live three hours away and can't do nearly as much from a distance. Also, I don't know how often I'll be able to come down to do this sort of thing, so, you know, make hay while the sun shines and all that....

[mevennen.livejournal.com]

When my late partner was dying, and when Trevor was ill, I really appreciated what people did, or offered to do. Sometimes it was things that might seem very small. When my father was in the army (he fought in WWII), someone gave him a free cup of tea. He's still talking about that, 70 years later. In 70 years' time, I'll still be talking about the free pot of tea that some lads gave me on a Chinese housing estate in 1994, when I was lost and was waiting for a boat.

I know what you mean. With other people, it's just that you do what you do. But to the person on the receiving end, it can make more difference than you know. It's not even getting the support - nine times out of ten, I didn't need it. But it is knowing that the support is there that is so important, and that enables one to go on.

You can do the smallest thing, and it can have the biggest impact.

[jaylake.livejournal.com]

What she said. And yes, thank you, Janna. Very much.