Home is where . . .

[scarlettina]

So one of my passtimes during this pandemic life has been perusing homes for sale on Redfin and Zillow. For a while, it was entertainment. For a while it was boredom. But the more I do it, the more I feel the 20+ years I've been here weighing on me. A lot has happened here, some great things, some things that I need to put behind me in a pretty significant way. It may be time for me to really find a new space to build my life in a new way. I feel stymied and stuck. I feel like no matter how I rearrange and reorganize, it's the same damn place with the same damn issues and the same damn memories. I want better space, not necessary larger but better distributed and better organized. I want something newer without as many issues. I have to learn to trust myself and my gut feelings, and this feeling of stagnation is just wearing on me. I've put in a call to my investment banker to see where things are at with my accounts. I want to talk things through with someone who doesn't have an emotional investment in where I am and who understands my financial situation. I want to see if I can get pre-qualified and figure out what that will mean. If I know what my options are, I can make a more informed decision about which way I want to go, whether it's stay and prep the place for sale, renovate and make it work, or just dump the place and move on. All I know is I feel stuck and I need to move or just disintegrate.

Comments

[lilysea]

Are you thinking

new house in same suburb?

new house in different suburb but same city?

new house in different city?

[scarlettina]

I'm currently thinking new condo, same city. I'm not in the suburbs and I'm unlikely to go there; too family focused. I need a more urban environment. But Seattle is a city of neighborhoods and there are several I like. It has been suggested to me by some that I ought to think about moving back to New York, but I am less sanguine about that prospect than I've ever been since I moved here. I couldn't afford to live where I'd want to (somewhere in Manhattan); I don't know Brooklyn well enough to figure out where it would make sense for me to live, though it seems the most likely second choice.

[lilysea]

I'm not in the suburbs and I'm unlikely to go there; too family focused

Ah, looks like a language difference - in Australia "suburb" doesn't neccessarily mean "in the suburbs"

eg North Melbourne and South Melbourne are both highly urbanised, but we still call them "the suburb of North Melbourne", "the suburb of South Melbourne"

In Australia we talk about "inner-city suburbs" vs "outer-city suburbs"

Everything apart from the Central Business District [which is mainly banks and shops, not residential] is a suburb.

[scarlettina]

Ah! That makes sense. I guess I didn't realize you were in Australia! Hi from the other side of the world!

[annofowlshire]

Sometimes we outgrow spaces or places or it no longer serves us. Not in a physical stuff kind of way, but in a “we are different people looking for different things now.” Has a particular place taken your fancy?

I loved living in Ballard and Fremont, but my knowledge is now several years out of date.

[garyomaha]

It sounds as if you don't *have* to leave your current home, so you have many options including staying put. We did a lot of house-hunting in Seattle -- albeit around 2000, so things have changed. Our goals were (1) a certain amount of space (reconfigurable if necessary) and (2) proximity to mass transit. The location was entirely up for discussion (we looked at places all over town). Sounds like it's a different mix for you. Good luck and have fun!

[cordjostler]

Interest rates are pretty darned low right now. I don't know if this helps at all, but the average break even point on the cost of closing and loan origination is something like 16 months. So even if you move and don't like it, if you stay for a year an a half, you probably wouldn't be losing money on the deal. And honestly, in this time of crazy housing inflation, you'd probably come out ahead.

[jreynoldsward]

Sometimes you just outgrow a place. Not necessarily for size, but when life changes, sometimes a place that works for you no longer does. The first house we owned was careening toward issues that needed to be addressed...and subsequent owners took care of it by tearing the house down and rebuilding it. Drastic but I think it was the only real solution.

To me, the key is your statement: "I want better space, not necessary larger but better distributed and better organized." That was what I was feeling in that one house. It taught me what I didn't want. Subsequent spaces have been better and I'd happily remain where I am now for the rest of my life. But...we also sat down and put some work into this house to make it comfortable. It's maybe a few square feet larger than that first little house...but set up much better.

[girasole_ladyhawk]

Do this thing.

[varina8]

That sounds like a good approach! Keep me posted.